ave.

all praise is due to the most high!

I’ve been thinking about the intro to ‘The Batman’ a lot.

I’m not sure that I could think of a better intro in recent memory.

I’ve struggled to keep my mind clear and focused, but after talking with some friends and seeing what lies in front of me, I feel like it all makes more sense than ever.

God bless the weak. God bless those who struggle.

I spend a lot of time thinking about people who probably are not doing the same. it’s a prison of sorts.

I miss you, but this feels better right?

I’m re-learning a lot about me.

when I first got back from Europe, it felt like something had changed. it still very much feels different, but also the same.

I have to remind myself that my situation is not going to get better on its own. talking with people helps, but there’s a lot of time that I need to spend alone to make it better.

I continue to strive for more because I want more, and I can do more. it’s not easy. I don’t think it was ever meant to be, but I’m learning. slowly. surely.

there are things that I cannot tolerate anymore. things that make me so sick, I am needing change. I am needing to burn it all down and re-build it from the ground up, with a foundation that cannot be denied by me, or by God himself.

it’s a crazy thing to think “oh, I actually need to change. like genuinely. not once a week, twice a week, or every other day. like every waking moment, re-wiring your brain to think and respond differently.” because then you have to do it. or stick with whatever you got and try to drown out the noise that is telling you that you can do better. that you deserve better. that those who care for you and trust in you deserve better. it’s a lot.

I find myself just about back home. not physically, but mentally, spiritually, emotionally. scary. it’s baked into me. something I need to confront in one way or another, asking God for strength.

all praise is due to the most high.

action / everything.